December is here, the last month of the year! Wow, how time flies. Seriously, new year feels just like yesterday but here we are at the end of the year already. So to finish the year strong, I came up with this 30 Days Self-confidence challenge while setting the pace for 2022.
1) Smile at a stranger
I pray you smile from a place of understanding knowing fully well that smiling is powerful especially when the smiles are really genuine
2) List 5 things you love about yourself
No human being can love you better than you love yourself. Find out those things you love about yourself and build on them. This will boost your self confidence tremendously
3) Dance to your favorite song
If like me, you find it hard having favorites, pick any song you really like and just dance. Also, you don’t need to be a pro dancer. Recording yourself is a plus, so you can always rewatch and relive the moment.
4) Give someone a compliment
That feeling of making someone else smile, simply priceless. A random text or call from you just complimenting a friend, colleague or neighbor about how good they are will be amazing. You can boost your self confidence by boosting that of someone else.
5) Prepare your favorite meal
Be it a salad, cocktail, fries, etc it doesn’t have to be complicated. However if you have enough time and resources whatever your favorite meal is, go for it. You might also want to try a new recipe.
6) Don’t talk negatively aboutotherpeoplefor the whole day
A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart brings forth evil. For out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.
You only speak what your heart and mind have harbored for a while. When next a negative thought about someone comes to your mind, replace it immediately with a positive one.
7) Get at least 8 hours of sleep
8) Do something you loved doing as a child
Think about that game you loved so much during childhood…
9) Do a little self care
Try having some ‘you time’ just taking care of yourself. You could do an exercise, get a massage, journal, meditate or just spend time alone with God.
10) Do a social media detox
Taking some time off social media will help you focus on yourself and reconnect with the things that really make you happy.
11) list 3 things you have accomplished
As the year draws to an end, it’s very easy to think about the things you failed to do, but how about you take out time to list the things you’ve accomplished so far? This will definitely boost your self confidence and encourage you not to give up.
12) Say No to something
The strength of your will power is determined by your ability to say NO. You don’t always have to say yes to everything especially if it doesn’t allign with your values, goals and beliefs.
13) Implement a new healthy habit
It has been proven that to develop a new habit, the same thing has to be done consistently for 21 days. So if you start today, by the time the new year begins, it will be part of your lifestyle.
14) Treat yourself out
You don’t always have to wait for someone else to do it and it doesn’t have to be too expensive or extravagant. You could visit a nice garden or your favorite restaurant
15) Practice a power pose
In order to boost and maintain self confidence, you need to have the right posture. There are many power poses, salutation pose, Victory pose and just recently I found out smiling is among too.
16) Do something you’ve never done before
Try a new dish, visit a new place, try a new activity or sport. To begin, start by trying to name one thing you’ve never done then work from there. PS: it should be something good and positive that will make you see life from a new perspective.
17) Put on your favoriteoutfit
There’s always that one dress that once you put on, you feel different and your self confidence is just on another level. How about you wear it today, and of course take a good picture while at it.
18) Say this affirmation 3 times
« I am beautiful, confident and deserving of the best »
Say it first thing in morning before stepping out, say it at random periods of your day, declare it boldly before going to bed.
19) Try something new with your hair
It doesn’t matter if you already have a particular hairstyle right now. Just try to style it in a new way.
20) Describe somethingrandomor weird that brings you joy.
Most at times we have a memory that when we think about, we burst out in laugh. Today, don’t wait for anyone to make you laugh, think about anything weird or random that brings you joy.
21) Buy yourself a gift.
When was the last time you got yourself a gift? Some people will put in so much thought and resources when gifting others but when it comes to themselves, anything goes! It’s December, the last month of the year, try rewarding yourself for the years effort and achievements. It could be anything small but should be meaningful.
23) Talk to a stranger
I know you probably meet and talk with strangers every day, but today be really intentional about it.
24) Write down 5 things you are gratefulfor
It doesn’t matter how many times things went wrong throughout the year, there are still many things to be grateful for. Think deeply about the things you are grateful for and write them down. An attitude of gratitude is a great recipe for self confidence.
25) Reach out to an old friend
It’s Christmas Day and many people will be expecting wishes and gifts from family and loved ones. How about you surprise an old friend or someone you haven’t talked to in a long while ?
26) List 3 of your strengths
Maximise your strengths…
27) List 3 weaknesses you will work on next year
Minimise your weaknesses! Don’t be that person who always say ‘ that’s just the way I am’ If you can work on it, please do. In order for you to become the best version of yourself, you need to minimise your weaknesses.
28) Do a complete skin care routine and record.
Do you have a skin care routine? What are the components of your skin care routine?
29) List 3 people in your life you are gratefulfor
Earlier on, you listed the things you were grateful for but now, list the 3 people in your life right now that you are grateful for. Once you identify them, why not let them know how much you are grateful for them. Remember, your network is your net worth.
30) Name one thing you like about your body or appearance
Here at Beiblackbeauty our vision is that you be comfortable and confident in your own skin. You are beautiful just the way you are.
Congratulations, if you made it to the end of the challenge. I hope you feel good about yourself and your self confidence has increased.
I’ve always wondered what causes traffic on a highway. I mean, if every driver sticks to his own lane, there shouldn’t be any traffic, right? Whether you are late for work, an interview, exams or just a meeting, everybody hates traffic and tries avoiding it. Sometimes in avoiding, we escape, other times we get trapped in a more serious traffic. This article, the highway of life, tries to bring out the different life lessons we can get from the road traffic we experience daily.
There’s a kind of traffic which is just a little bit annoying. That’s the one caused by traffic controllers and lights on the highway. You know they’re doing a good job but you may have a change of mind. Especially if the red light appears directly in front of you not once or twice in a row. At least, this kind of traffic is only temporary and last for a few seconds.
Traffic lights are used to alternate right of way to users. Red means stop, green means go and yellow means slow down. Usually we don’t decide whether or not to follow them, we just follow! Now, relating this to life, can you think of anyone who has such authority over your life?
Like all electronics, we have a creator. The same way a manufacturer controls his product, God controls the universe. In a way, I often look up to Him the same way as the machine controlling all the traffic lights we see on roads. UNSEEN but very powerful. Now let’s compare their functions.
Everyone is happy when the lights turn green. Green lights mean progress, success, improvement, growth and a step closer to destination. How do you feel when you have been given right of way, and the cars on the other lane haven’t? happy right!
There are moments in our lives when we feel like we’re making progress. So many open doors, opportunities and favors. Everything happens so fast that before you even notice you’ve reached your destination. How you maximize this particular point of your life will determine how fast you’ll get to your destination. Imagine you had a free lane, but you don’t speed up and end up in another traffic. What a waste!
Orange or yellow lights usually indicates to a driver to slowdown or to proceed with caution. It’s more of a warning and an advance notice that there’s something ahead. It’s a little bit tricky because it doesn’t say ‘stop’ directly. Do you sometimes feel like you’re going too fast and need to stop for a while? or do you feel like God maybe giving you a signal, a warning! that you need to slow down. Sometimes you only realize in retrospection that there was a warning signal, but you probably didn’t notice.
Red is a color of extremes. It could mean love and passion as well it could also mean danger. In this case, it means the latter. In a way, it’s actually meant for good but we always see otherwise. Just like we said green means progress, red on the contrary means no progress. But no progress doesn’t always necessarily mean regression. Like seriously, it hurts to see others making progress in life and others even reaching their goals meanwhile you’re still on the same spot. I always hate it when cars on the other lane are given right of way and not us. It makes me wish I was rather on their lane.
You will agree with me that, this is similar on the highway of life. Sometimes you’re on the move, at high speed. Other times you’re slowing down and sometimes even completely on hold. Which ever one you find yourself in, you need to understand that it’s part of the process. The people you think are progressing aren’t always like that. At some point in their lives, things weren’t moving too. It’s never just a green light, if you’re lucky to have met a green light, sooner or later you’ll meet a red light or yellow light. If you met a red light be grateful because you don’t know the danger that was ahead. The red light will never be there permanently
On the highway of life, we’ve been placed on different lanes. We received different signals at different moments. Some may last longer than others but whatever the case is stay on your own lane and learn from it.
You don’t drink alcohol, they say you are childish and they wonder how you drink only sweet drinks. You don’t wear exposing dresses such as beach wears (the really exposing ones) they say you are shy. You don’t go to clubs or bars, they say you are too uptight and need to loosen up. This article isn’t meant to judge anyone for their actions but rather to encourage you to be steadfast with whatever positive decision you’ve made as concerns your life. I’ve noticed a lot of negative energy especially on social media concerning New Year resolutions. You’d hear someone say something like, “my people with New Year resolutions, how far?” in a very sarcastic way. A lot of people have been discouraged from making resolutions just from such comments. It’s almost like they are just waiting for them to fail or give up and I don’t see how helpful that kind of reaction is. Well, scientifically it has been proven that majority of people who make New Year resolutions end up failing. Here are some of the reasons why
Lack of self belief
If you’ve tried to set a New Year resolution in the past and failed maybe severally, it might be difficult for you to believe in yourself. Doubt is a destroyer of personal growth and the way to defeat doubt is to believe in yourself. Every new day, week, month or year is an opportunity to start afresh. Even if you’ve tried and failed many times just because you’re still alive means there’s hope. This year you can try again but better this time.
Much thinking, less doing
I’m sure if life was only about our thoughts then many people will be billionaires by now but that’s not the case. Most of our goals aren’t realistic making it hard to apply them. If you could train yourself to put one thing you learn from every book or article into practice, you’ll make much progress in life.
You don’t find the process to be fun
If you think your life is boring because you’ve decided to abstain from certain things then it would be very easy for you to give up. There are certainly many ways to ‘have fun’. First of all, that statement could mean so many different things to different people. One person’s way of having fun could be to drink a whole bottle of wine while another could be to finish a whole chicken. So do not think you are missing out on life based on another person’s perspective. Find which works for you and create time to have fun without being intimidated by someone else’s way of having fun.
You don’t know your why
Knowing what you want is important as well as knowing why you want it. If you don’t have a good reason for not doing something then someone can easily give you a good reason to do it. That’s one of the reasons why we are persuaded into doing things which we didn’t plan to do. For example there’re many times I’ve been told I don’t wear certain dresses because I’m shy and I’m like what does being descent have to do with being shy. Being bold is a positive trait so I can easily be tempted to think that I need to wear exposing dresses to prove my boldness which will be a wrong way to look at it. I once asked a friend why she doesn’t drink alcohol and she said she likes testing her willpower. That really got me in a positive way. How often do you put your willpower to the test. This is a good way to grow mentally. Define your whys and let them be known clearly by you so that when temptation comes you’ll have a good reason not to fall. Whatever you have decided to do this year that you think is going to be helpful to your personal growth, be true to yourself and don’t allow yourself to be derailed by what people say. They would not understand why you do the things you do. You must not do what seems like everyone is doing. You must not stick to the status quo. Deciding to do things differently already sets you on a path towards greater achievements. Believe in yourself and believe that you are doing the right thing for your purpose and destiny.
1 Corinthians 9:27New King James Version (NKJV)
27 But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.
Finally, if you haven’t yet decided to do something differently this year, or you haven’t yet decided to improve at least one area of your life, I strongly encourage you to do so. Stretch yourself, leave your comfort zone, do something daring, make this year a memorable one. You are probably not at the level where you ought to be because of some things weighing you down and hindering you from making progress. Most people end up failing but you can be part of those who succeed. Yes you can!
In our milieu, students always have the tendency of asking this question, “where did my money go?” and when it comes to finances, the problem of money management is almost a no problem. It’s so common that many have considered it to be normal. If you’re looking for a way to get yourself out of the financial mess you are into, a simple budget can be a step to your breakthrough. What is a budget in the first place, a budget is an estimate of income and expenditure for a set period of time. Listed below are some of the reasons why I think you should start budgeting
Importance of budgeting
Many students tend to notice they spend money on petty things so budgeting allows them to adjust spending habits and put money towards meaningful areas.
Plan for the unexpected so that the unexpected will come to be expected.
Sends red lights when your projected budget is more than your income.
Now if those reasons convinced you enough, you should be asking yourself now how you can make a good budget. Following these steps below will set you on a good pace.
*please note that the steps below are addressed mostly to students who receive a regular monthly income or pocket allowance.
5 steps to make an effective budget
For one month keep track of all your expenses: take note of how much cash you had at start of the month (This includes your pocket allowance and tips from relatives, friends ),how much you spent at end of month and how much you have left over.
After the first month take stock of what you spent: write down what you actually spent (expenditure) in details and categorize your expenditure in a way that makes sense to you. Begin with your fixed expenses such as tithes, monthly contributions. Then proceed with variable expenses such as gas, groceries. For example
For a monthly income of 20 000 frs
Set your goals: these could be short term goals like saving for a textbook or long term goals like saving for a future car. Knowing your priorities in life will help you make a better budget. For example it will be easier for you to cut spending if your goal is to pay debts.
Now write down your actual budget: based on your knowledge of your spending history, budget out how much of your income you want to allocate to each category every month.
Adjust your spending habits: looking at your budget, if you notice that you are spending more than you are earning, you might need to consider adjusting your habits. In doing this, focus more on your needs than wants. For example you might want to start cooking rather than eating at restaurants and if you really have to eat out why not go to a cheaper restaurant. The money you spend on internet bundles is not worth it if all you do is flex on social media. You might also decide to look for more ways to earn more maybe a part time job but it all depends on you. You know yourself better, just be honest. To be disciplined is not easy but at the end you’ll be very proud of yourself.
Keep track of your budget over time: it’s important that you review your budget on a regular basis to ensure that you’re on track. The hard part is your expenses may change from month to month for example your gas might get finish making your expenses for that month way more than your expenses during the previous month. But the great part is that, you will be able to keep track of the changes, giving you an accurate idea of where your money is going to.
How to allocate your monthly income
This isn’t a formula but rather a suggestion. Meaning it all depends on you ( i.e. your responsibilities, priorities, etc). The main thing is your budget should reflect your lifestyle. A practical example includes
Food, clothing 20%
Budgeting for real can be difficult considering it takes a lot of discipline but once you make it a habit, you’ll enjoy it. If you don’t know where your money is going then your money is controlling you. Decide today to take charge of your money, START BUDGETING!
In a town like Yaounde, the capital of Cameroon, rush hour is such an annoying moment. The roads are jam packed with all sorts of people; students, parents and workers trying to make it to their various destinations on time while motorbikes and taxis are hurrying to get as many customers as possible. You can end up standing at the road side for literally an hour or even more. During one of my long holidays, I decided to work at my dad’s office which is like 30 minutes away from home on a normal day. But of course when there’s traffic, it can take one hour or more. Transportation wasn’t always easy and one occasion I got to learn a lot.
There are times you notice there are too many people going to the same destination as you and so you decide to propose say 300 francs instead of the normal 250 francs most likely because you’re running late. Next thing is the taxi takes you but doesn’t take the others who are proposing just 250 francs.
If you want to get there fast you need to go the extra mile.
You need to do something others aren’t doing.
To be outstanding, you need to stand out.
There’s no way you can make a difference by being indifferent.
If you aren’t where you’re supposed to be right now, maybe you need to start studying more, praying more, giving more, helping more, thinking more etc. just DO MORE.
If you’re asking yourself what the point is since they all will finally reach their destination, remember that life is like a race each one of us having our own paths and most of all, our days are numbered.
If you have the opportunity to do more, why not do it? There’s no time to waste.
In another situation, after proposing 250 francs for too long, 10 minutes pass then 20 then 30. Finally, you get tired of being rejected by taxis and standing on the same spot for too long and so decide to propose 300 francs. You think probably the 250 francs wasn’t enough. After a taxi takes you, somewhere along the road not far from where you were standing, someone else who proposes the normal fare gets taken too.
There are times in our lives when we feel rejected and then we decide to do things just to get others to like us or be attracted to us. So it’s like increasing the taxi fare in order to get the driver’s attention. But the truth is, maybe they weren’t just the right people for you. If the taxi was going your direction, it would certainly have taken you even without hesitating and for the normal fare. If it didn’t take you, then it wasn’t going your way, not that your proposal wasn’t good enough. So if you get rejected, remember that it might be because you aren’t going the same direction as them. You probably don’t have the same goals or mindset as them. So be patient, the taxi that was meant for you and is going to your destination will definitely take you. One good prayer you could make is that God should send the right people who have similar goals, dreams and visions as you that will help you get there faster.
Then there are those funny days that you propose something less than the normal. For example, you might be proposing 150 francs when you know that it is 200 francs. And when you are asked to pay 200 francs, you refuse.
It is true the taxi is going your way but what you have to offer isn’t just enough. They might be people who have same destination as you and if you still get rejected then maybe the problem is with you this time around. You might say you have just 150 francs in other words you are saying, that’s how you are or that you were born that way. We all have our weaknesses but we can become much better especially as Christians for we are being transformed daily by the renewing of our mind. So it’s not normal for you to be hot tempered, angry, or negative, you can be better. When you finally decide to propose 200 francs you’ll be surprised at how rapidly the next taxi going to your destination will take you.